Monday, June 29, 2015

Just a Vague, Random Post.

I feel like blogging, but I don't really know what to say. There's actually a lot I want to say, but there's some stuff I can't really say publicly yet. Our life feels so up in the air right now, which is really hard for the type-A, planner in me. But like I said in my last post, I'm letting go of the worry and stress and trusting in Heavenly Father that everything is going to work out and be okay. We are really, really happy and we have been recipients of some huge blessings and miracles lately. It seems good things are happening all at once after months of not-so-good things. It's such a faith-building experience to see prayers answered and see Heavenly Father's hand in our lives.

I'm sorry for being so vague--but since this blog is public and not private, I can't go into more details. But once things are more settled, I promise I will blog alllllllll about our year. Because it's been an absolute crazy one. 2015 will forever be known as the year of the roller coaster.

Oh and tomorrow is my last day at my nanny job. So weird and so sad. I have been trying to explain to Enzo why I'm not going to be his nanny anymore (it's because he's starting preschool) so he told me he's just going to skip preschool. Oh my gosh. Soooo sad. I can't really handle it.




Basically life is cray-cray over here and there are SO many changes happening. I feel overwhelmed, stressed, but overall just extremely happy and so blessed. Life is good!

And really, is there anything cuter than puppies in a bucket? I don't think so!

Friday, June 12, 2015

Letting Go.

"Let it go, let it go. Can't hold it back anymore. Let it go, let it go. Turn away and slam the door."

Yes, so cliche and so cheesy, but I've always loved this song. It applies to me in SO many areas of my life. But one thing I really need to let go of right now is MY plan and my pride.

It's hard to just turn your life into the hands of Heavenly Father and I've been fighting it for so long... but I know I need to. I know I need to stop "fighting" with Him and just give myself up. How prideful for me to think that my plan is better? That I know better? That I know what's best for me? I can mope and whine and cry and plead all day long... but in the end, it doesn't do any good does it? It doesn't change the fact that MY plan isn't going to happen. It's never MY plan. It's always HIS plan. And I know this, but for some reason I have the hardest time accepting it. I have been begging him to answer my prayers. I have been praying for a miracle. And last week I was done. I didn't want to pray anymore. I was so upset that nothing seemed to be happening.

Later that day, something amazing happened. I guess you could call it a small miracle. It was something we've been praying for for MONTHS (more on that later, no I'm not pregnant!) I felt like such a spoiled brat. I've been praying and pleading and begging and then felt so angry that I hadn't received MY answer in MY timeframe that I wanted. So I didn't pray. Me me me me me. PRIDE.

So when my prayer was finally answered I felt so guilty for being angry and not praying earlier that morning. I immediately turned to prayer and thanked Heavenly Father for answering our prayers and apologized again and again for being such a brat. Did I feel like He was upset with me? Not at all. Because He knows me. And He knows my heart. He knows how much I love Him. He knows my intentions and my desires. He knows my struggles. He knows my fears. He knows my hopes. And I think that was His way of showing me that He IS listening and he DOES care. I can't just give up on him like that, especially when I need Him the most.

So keep praying for miracles. Keep praying through your trials. Even though somedays you might feel like He's not listening, He is. Let go of your plans and turn your life over to Him. He knows what's best and His plan for our life is far better than what we could even imagine. It's all going to be okay. Life is good.

P.S. If you feel like I've blogged about this very thing before, you are right. I have the hardest time giving up my plans and it is something I am constantly reminding myself of! :)

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

The Big 2-6.

What the heck? I swear I'm still a teenager. I can't believe I'm actually 26! AHHH! Does this mean I'm no longer in my early twenties? Haha I am in denial.

I had the BEST birthday. It was so simple, but perfect. Landon spoiled me and didn't stop telling me happy birthday all weekend long. He kept asking me if I felt special because he wanted to make sure I did. Pretty much anything I wanted to do, we did it...which of course mostly involved eating yummy food! ;)

We seriously ate SO good (or should I say bad?!) all weekend. Birthdays are actually meant to be celebrated all week, in case you didn't know. We ate out at Red Robin twice, Chipotle, got DQ blizzards, ate Tillamook Mudslide ice-cream, and ate a dozen donuts within two days. YUM!


On Saturday after going to dinner Landon asked if I wanted my birthday present early, and of course I couldn't resist. We got home and he went to the garage and walked back into the house holding a Victoria's Secret bag. In my head I was thinking, okay... so he got me lingerie?! Isn't that more like a Valentine's Day type thing? Haha! Turns out, it was just the gift wrap he used because he didn't know where I keep the birthday bags. I honestly wasn't expecting anything because our trip to England was supposed to be our Christmas AND birthday present, so I was really surprised that he even got me anything. He's just so sweet! I was expecting something little, like maybe a cute shirt or something. So when I opened it, I was seriously in SHOCK!



I have been asking for a GoPro for years! Seriously! Every time we go sailing on the Hobie, I tell Landon how we need to get a GoPro so we can make videos and take pictures! I am SO excited!!!!!

On my actual birthday (Monday) I had the day off work, which meant I got to sleep in and have a lazy morning with Landon. I call these types of mornings "bed mornings." Basically you wake up and you just stay in bed for an hour or longer. You eat breakfast in bed, you watch a movie, and you cuddle. They're seriously my favorite thing in the whole world!

Landon had to go into work for a little bit, so I got ready for the day and then cuddled on the couch watching a chick flick with my pups.

Luckily he didn't stay for long, because I started to feel lonely (I hate being alone!) He came home for lunch and we had a party pizza and mac and cheese. We used to eat this SO much before I started eating healthy, and I figured that since I'd already eaten half a dozen donuts and my weight in ice cream, I might as well continue with the eating like crap trend ;)

Then something really exciting happened... we finally did the resin infusion on the float half that Landon has been working on for MONTHS. I know most of you won't know what that means, but basically it was a HUGE step for building the boat. It was fun to watch it all happen and help Landon do it :)



After that excitement, we went to Red Robin and then came home to snuggle on the couch and hang out with our boys. We also messed around with my GoPro... I'm obsessed!!! It's so much fun!





I seriously started crying quite a few times throughout the day...happy tears of course! I had SOOOO many meaningful texts, phone calls, emails, Facebook shoutouts, etc. that just made me feel so special and loved. THANK YOU!!!!! 


I think I'm going to like being 26. I'm like a real-life adult now ;)

P.S. I share a birthday with my daddy. He always tells me I was his best birthday present. I love this picture of us 22 years ago :)


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